Cheese Tosser

Oh it's good fun. You love fucking and wanking. The feeling of spunk leaving your cock. A big orgasm zooming over you. Thru you. All the way big man! When 'normal' people found out, it was mad.

Holy cow, this is real?? Or holy cheese with a cock hole in it.

Yankee, mad, lives in Philadelphia. His crimes took part there.

Don't fuck Phily cheese in England, you'll get linched. But in the States, you're God.

Short fat bald men who fuck cheese, love you. You've a long history of a special fetish. Salute yourself for that. For years you wanted women to wank you off with cheese.

How did this start?

Were you bullied as a kid and it just occurred? Were you eating a cheese sandwich and it ended up on your cock? And went from there? Did you really drive around, your kecks down, cock out and cheese in hand, looking for birds?

That was caught on camera.

I take it you don't like men or you'd be a big hit on the gay scene. Open-mindedness abounds there.

But you're the Swiss Cheese Pervert, 300 pounds of meat, who solicits sex and wants to get it on.

You're message to a lady on a dating site asked for your fetish: to be masturbated with cheese.

This isn't so bizarre.

Some men have their bollocks nailed to a board, some women shop in Tesco's with love balls up their pussy. Erotic couples go swinging. Are you so bad?

The only question is this... did you ever have a woman toss you off with soft cheese? If so, is she like you, unique and a sexual deviant?

Or the next level in sexual evolution.

A cop who knows you said: "And I believe cheese was on the menu, but I'm not completely sure. If my memory serves me, it was Swiss."