Friday, 31 May 2013

WOW! TATTOO MY BUTT - MORE MAD POEMS AND VERSE BY NICK By Nick Armbrister

WOW! TATTOO MY BUTT -

MORE MAD POEMS AND VERSE BY NICK

By Nick Armbrister

Zoos Comet

Her empty lies mean more than all the halls of silence.
We've been shafted, double penetrations are the worst.
Are they excited at where they'll wake up after committing suicide?
No more shit.
Metallic grey sparks on metal elements realigning.
A case of falling space objects.
In town they complained of the noise.
Damn rock could have flattened them.
The Theran dance goes on.
Cast out by the hand of fate.

Nick’s Inner Beauty

There’s more to me than my tattoos.
I’m the person inside;
I have views feelings, emotions, dreams and desires.
I’m not a piece of wood.
My inner beauty shines forth.
BUT
I wear my soul upon my skin.
See what bits you can spot.
Turn me inside out.
I’m a bare white light of energy.
My inner being is free.
My love of a certain band =
a certain tattoo of them.

out now on lulu.com

JUNIPER’S DAUGHTER - A HOLIDAY HORROR

JUNIPER’S DAUGHTER - A HOLIDAY HORROR

   Dan won a holiday in a competition he had entered three months ago. It was a break for two in Central Norway. As he was single, he took his mate called Lee with him. Both lads had been single for some time and welcomed a break from grimy Ashton.
   They were stood on a medium size mountain overlooking a glacier in a two mile wide valley. It was a stunning sight. “Quite something isn’t it?” Dan said, shielding his gaze from the midday sun. The glacier seemed to glow blue in the light. It was sunlight reacting with air bubbles within the ice.
   “Yes mate. You can see forever. It’s beautiful,” Lee commented, nodding in agreement.
   “Come on, let’s climb the rest of the mountain,” Dan indicated, pointing to the heights.
   “Okay if you want to. We’ll have to be careful,” the other agreed. It was potentially very dangerous, with jagged rocks on the icy mountain side.
   Both men turned and slowly ascended the two thousand foot high granite mountain. It towered over the one they were already on. On the way up, Lee thought of what Dan had done the year before. It was a nasty thought of a nasty event. He kept quiet, not alerting his mate to any trouble.
   Half an hour later both climbers reached the top. It had been an easy climb, avoiding the perilous rocks. Dan stood near the edge, at the summit. A pile of rocks indicated the highest point of 2,046 feet. He was about to say how nice the view of the valley was when Lee acted out his revenge. Anger burned inside his evil twisted heart, he thought of his wife who was now pregnant and living in France. She had slept with Dan and fled the country back to her parents.
   “I know full well what you did with my wife, Dan. For that, you must die!” Lee whispered, breaking Dan’s reverie of the valley.
   “What? What the fuck are you talking about?” Dan retorted, his eyes on his friend.
   “You fucked my wife and got her pregnant. Then she left England and fled to France, leaving me,” Lee angrily explained. He took a step towards Dan.
   “How... how the hell did you find out?” Lee gasped, his secret found out. He was seized by panic and looked around at the cliff edge. It was very close.
   “That’s right Dan, I’ve known all along. I saw you both together fucking, your cock going into the slag’s pussy. She was loving it, you pounding her cunt. And now you must pay the price.”
   “She seduced me. It wasn’t my fault. She started it, blame her!” worry filled Dan’s entire body. He tried to speak but couldn’t.
   “Maybe so but she’s not here, she’s in France. You are and it’s time to die, you twat!” In one simple action, Lee pushed Dan off the top of the mountain. It was a long way down. Dan screamed once and fell out of sight.
   “Game over Danny-boy. You thought I never knew. I bided my time till now. Now that you’re dead, my revenge is complete. They’ll say it’s a simple climbing accident and I’ll get away with it. You swine!”
   Down below, Dan thudded onto the rocks, dead. Every bone in his body was broken.

***

   Step back in time. What would you have done? Murder your best friend or let it all go and forgive him? The ex wife was a cow and look at the times Dan and Lee were having now, in lovely Norway. Time reverses. Back on the mountain top, above a blue glacier, two men take in the moment. After ten minutes, one spoke: “This place is beautiful. Look at it, this is perfect.”
   The other replied, “Yes, nothing is equal to the majesty of the mountains.”
   A cloudless powder blue sky arced overhead and black ravens flew cawing past. One of the two men, Lee, commented. “You did me a favour, last year.”
   “I know. I’m sorry but I had to do it Lee. I do regret it, making love to your wife,” replied Dan. His expression was like the stony ground that he gazed down upon.
   Lee thought for a minute. Should he confess his evil thoughts? Yes. Best this is sorted out, now while they were alone. Anything could happen. “I was going to push you off the top and kill you, right now.”
   “What? You were what?” Dan gasped. The enormity of what his friend said hit home. I could be dead in the valley, at this instant, if Lee had pushed me off the edge. Why did he tell me, not do it? Does he feel guilty? Dan was full of anxiety, worry and another emotion he couldn’t place.
   “Yes, I was. I’d be a murderer then and carry the mark of Cain. I was so close to doing it Dan and I stopped. A split second before I was going to do it,” Lee whispered. He became morose and distant. Up above, ravens circled and chattered to one another. An omen?
   “I don’t know what to say, I don’t.” Dan gasped, his heart beating in his chest. He began to sweat and wiped his brow. He looked away from his cunning friend and at the valley. It was a peaceful scene.
   “Don’t say anything, forget it.”
   “No, I won’t be silent! I did you a favour Lee. The wife who took your cash is back in France, out of your life. Now it’s like the old days. We can go to the pub, see a live band and go on holiday. How can anything be better than this? Look at it,” Dan angrily shouted.
   “I was going to kill you, now I’m not. Don’t you see? I saw the error of my ways. I should have seen sense before I married the money grabbing bitch. I didn’t. You did me a favour, even if you did it like a cunt. I’m free of the gold digging bitch. You hurt my pride, that’s why I was going to murder you. My wounded pride, silly I know.” Lee had never been this honest in his life, not even to the cops when he had stolen a car when he was fifteen. He got off on that as there was no evidence. This was different, this was almost murder. What was he thinking? Almost killing his friend and now admitting it. Was he mad? Had he done the right thing? Slowly, the tension left his body and he knew he had. One of the ravens flew off, into the valley.
   Dan looked incredulous. The realisation that he could have been dead, two thousand feet below was a strong one. It bounced around his head like a rubber ball. Dead, pushed by my friend, he admits it, all because I fucked his bitch of a wife. I had to get rid of her somehow! I couldn’t kill her, fucking her was the next best option! Dan kept his eye on his friend. Silence descended while both men collected their thoughts.
   “Okay. I’m sorry on sleeping with your wife and for hurting your pride, I apologise. Form the bottom of my heart, I’m sorry. I’ll make it up to you. Look, forget what happened. Let me buy you a beer in the tavern in the valley,” Dan finally said. He felt relieved at his apology. Would it be accepted? Would he be unharmed?
   Silence and the valley became magnified, like they were the only things on earth. Lee looked at Dan.
   Dan was going to comment again, he wanted this problem to end, in this remote place that belonged to God and nature. Why had it surfaced here, on the mountain? Was it a cleansing experience by forces both men couldn’t understand nor comprehend? Was it God at work? Or just coincidence? Away from busy England, the thoughts from the past year coming to the surface like trapped air underwater, because it was the right time. There was only one raven overhead. It flew in a circle, cawing to itself.
   “Yes, I accept your apology. Screw it, a beer sounds good. No, let’s have ten beers. Forget my ex wife, she won’t ruin our friendship. Good riddance to bad blood,” Lee said, smiling. A line had been crossed, for the better. He had accepted Dan’s apology and it looked like Dan forgave Lee.
   “On what you said on what you were going to do to me, forget that too. I forgive you; you saw common sense before it was too late. That was your wife making you act, not you. Let’s go to the tavern. We both need a drink.” Dan also forgave. The matter was at an end. The two men descended the mountain; both had been on a journey and had changed inside. One had lost his guilt and the other his anger; both had forgiven.
   Up above, the single raven descended to look for his mate. A clear blue sky remained and the peace of the valley was unbroken by an act of death. High above, almost out of sight, sun glinted off a silver object. It was a flying disc and inside was a witch called Juniper’s Daughter. She had achieved a positive result, changing both men’s intent, so evil wasn’t committed. The glinting object shone one more time and vanished. They never saw it. Two men were now at peace. The tavern beckoned...


JUNIPER’S DAUGHTER - TRIP

JUNIPER’S DAUGHTER - TRIP

   It was cloudy and we were lost in our airplane. A day trip in my brother’s plane turned out to be a nightmare – we were bloody lost! Our fuel was low. I kept an anxious eye upon the fuel gauge needle; it moved in only one direction, downwards to the empty mark. A fine mess!

   My brother grimaced and tapped the gauge. He too thought it was lying! Grimly he spoke: “This ain’t good Lee. We’ll have to ditch in the sea in ten minutes when our gas is gone. There’s no sign of the coast and the compass is bust.”

   I looked aghast at my brother. “What?”

   “In the sea. A force landing. I hope you can swim,” he added.

   Our plane flew lower and the engine stuttered. The grey sea looked menacing under equally grey clouds. We were going in! The engine stopped dead. We went down.

   “Oh shit!” I shouted.
  
   “Yes,” my bro commented.
----------------------


Thursday, 30 May 2013

Wrong Career

Wrong Career

I was young and worked in a garage. I was in the wrong job, aged 17. Why did I end up there? Was it fate punishing me for not joining the RAF? Other people thought I’d be good at fixing cars. I wasn’t; I was barely ok. Think of quiet me in a real man’s world. It was a daunting thought and there I was.
It was ok at first but soon went wrong. Trying to take a Volvo’s bumper off. Two hours later, still on the car. I ended up sweeping the floors, doing the brews and getting the butties. The duties of any green YTS employee or apprentice. Cheap labour. I hated working in garages thru those formative years when I was off the rails.
What else could I do? What can you do when you’re 17? It’s a big question, what to do with your working life, not to mention the rest of your life. I stuck it out. Got depressed, was bullied, raced cars on the streets, had crashes. Was a real fuck up. Worked in three different garages and hated them all. Other bad shit happened, I fought off suicidal urges. Darkness engulfed me.

Music saved me. Took my mind off the bullies in a garage that no longer exists. I became a goth and embraced who I was, bad part and all, in those distant dark troubled days of mine. Now I look back, it wasn’t all doom and gloom. It made me a man who is worldly wise. I’d say to my younger self, Nick don’t go fixing cars. Pick up a pen and write. Like I do now. My lifeline thru my years.

Wednesday, 29 May 2013

I BECOME NOTHING

I BECOME NOTHING

I ask how soon I will become nothing. When my sentiments tear me apart and bounce around my head like cannon balls from a faded war. I want to know so much more than what I’ve learnt in my forty years on this screwed up world, yes people do matter. If they didn’t, there would be no humanity, would there.

I want to go to Auschwitz and see where a million died. I want to know how it feels. Will my sense of humanity fail and will I understand why the Nazi’s murdered so many people, indiscriminately? Will I grow even smaller within myself, one more step towards nothing? What part of me will I leave behind at Auschwitz? Will it be my toes, my fingers, my toes or my soul or none of those?

I want to go with a certain girl I know. She can’t see, you see but she is one amazing lady, something very bravely poignant about walking amongst pure evil with a blind girl. Step by step, hand in hand, in Auschwitz.

I want to visit Normandy and see where the Allies liberated Europe from Hitler’s tyranny. And see the beaches where the surf turned red under German bullets. How close did the good guys come to losing? What part of me will I leave on Normandy beaches? My brain or my heart? A price paid, by me, for that trip. I’m a step closer to becoming nothing.

Then I’ll stop off at Flanders and see where Allied and German youth where bled white, the flowers of a generation lost forever in some stupid War to End All Wars. How wrong they were. Will my tears fall where the blood of Tommie and The Hun fell, cut apart where they lay? Not even their mothers’ knew how or where their sons died. Did they know why? What part of me will I forsake for the dead of World War One? Let their ghosts tell me.

I ask a lady who I haven’t met, yet, to take me to West Germany. Let us cross the border and go to Leipzig, to see where pretty Karin Ulbricht was taken on that dark unstable dangerous night when she demonstrated against her country’s leaders’ Cold War madness.

Wouldn’t it be memorable for me, if Karin showed me her country where she made Cold War history? She was a gentle warrior of those dark evil poisoned days before The Wall fell. Did she know that one single gunshot would have changed world history forever, when she demonstrated that autumn night? If thousands had been killed by East German soldiers, would the Cold War be over now? Is she still as pretty today, over two decades later? My letter to her remains unanswered. What part of me would die in Cold War Germany? What if I run out of sentiments?

Save me from Karin, take me to Afghan where young Tommies are dying by IED and insurgent terrorist fire. Are their deaths justified and saving us from terrorists? My views on this illegal war are not nice; surely there must be a better way? So no more young ladies find out on Facebook that their precious soldier love is dead? The soldiers I have met over the last few years were brave souls, I prey they’re all untouched. I don’t need to go to Afghan to have a part of me die, but I would if I could to see with my own eyes and write about it. More of me fading away to nothing, again I ask, how soon till I become nothing?

To all of the soldiers, to the innocent and even the guilty, who have perished in Mankind’s wars, I am sorry for your deaths. Why do I feel like this? Is there another way? I’d ask the Christian God but I know He tells lies. Now I know now what silence sounds like, it’s the sound of a woman’s weeping where her son, brother and husband, perished. Are they proud, do they smile when they think of what could have been? So many lost years? For what exactly? I’d forsake every part of me, to become nothing, to stop the wars. For that thought, I am a fool and ask for the impossible.


link to my new book...

http://www.lulu.com/shop/nick-armbrister/wow-tattoo-my-butt-more-mad-poems-and-verse-by-nick/paperback/product-21038505.html

Tuesday, 28 May 2013

Nesting


Nesting


I'm so twisted that my mate thinks he's my mother.

I got off the bus one stop early; Mars, not Earth.

I'd rather be torn apart by pain and trouble

from my loved ones than be in a corner ignored.

Let’s get aboard the W reg 1982 Yelloways coach and go to the old skool.

Is it fucked like the coach?

I'm a ballsy bastard, the job walker.

Whoop whoop!

Bricks in the yard.

To build what?

Defence against muggers.

On the head lads!

Mr Hardman what are you but a collection of spare parts?

Made up from your victims.

Their legacy now yours.